Two weeks ago I was invited up on stage to share, with more than 100 awesome women, my biggest fear about upping my game. Yikkes!
What was the main fear that was preventing me from stepping up as a passionate, skilled teacher, helping lots of people and being a successful, heart driven entrepreuner?
What fear was keeping me from actually putting on the transformational wellness retreats I had been dreaming about?
“So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself - nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.." -Franklin D Roosevelt
I was trembling like a leaf, as public speaking is another big fear of mine, as I played Gosia Gorna’s amazing Expansion Game. (I totally recommend her book aptly named, The Expansion Game).
I thought about it for a moment, but essentially my fear was feeling inadequate, not good enough, everyone was better than me, doing it better than me, more worthy than me and I was terrified of being being called out and critcised for my Pilates and Kundalini Yoga teaching style and, more daringly, my combined approach I call Limitless. Aarrgh Petrified! I said I was 9/10 scared but really it was more like 11/10! I am alone with these fears?
“What the hell are you doing, Laura? You’re rubbish, You are no good at this - go home, give up”.. said Fear, tossing her head back in glee. She knew I was cooked.
So we went deep, talked about this fear and Gosia expanded this to the point where I got a bit emotional (on stage, in front of 100 people, I know!) at the thought of this fear being transmitted to my 8 year old daughter.
What did it feel like that she too would feel unworthy, not good enough, fearful of criticism so she would shelve her dreams and live life in the shadows? A life of inadequacy and unadventure -staying small and never sharing her passions, nor her light, nor her skills, nor her talents.
Heartbreaking, that’s how it felt?
The process continues and there are a show of hands that, in fact, many people in the audience would like to go on a retreat where they are empowered, strengthened, aligned from the inside out in body, mind and soul so they can shoot for the moon.
A retreat where you disconnect from your devices, demands and the limiting beliefs you carry and reconnect into the powerful, limitless human being you already are, so you can live a radiant and full life. The audience agreed it was a pretty good idea.
So I am actually being selfish by not providing this service, Gosia tells me. I like how that sounded!
The energy shifted within me, the fear expanded until it popped and thus had no more power. Immediately I no longer feel afraid to the point of paralysis, like I had for a lifetime until that moment. I am now about 2 or 3/10. Incredible.
Two weeks later I am still a 2 or 3. I feel empowered and capable. I am a skilled profesional and have many happy, healthy clients that love working with me. I know it.
I will step up and do this for my daughter, for myself and for my clients who feel the incredible benefits in their worlds, and potential clients ready to get real about their welbeing. There is room for us all and we are all unique.
Not everyone will like my work, or your work, and that is okay. As Marie Forleo says “ If your talking to everyone you are talking to noone”.
What will happen if I am criticised? Not that much in real terms, my feelings may get hurt a bit? And that’s about it.
It is absolutely worth the risk to show my little girl the adventures that unfold when you feel the fear and do it anyway.
Soooooooo….Look out for info of my first and amazing wellness retreat in collaboration with the beautiful Laila Rojas the Radiant Vita Health Coach.. More details coming soon. If you aren’t on my mailing list sign up now..
Blow your fear up and pop it!
How does fear show up for you? Dig deep - are there layers to it? Are you making excuses for the excuses? What is fear preventing you from doing in your life?
Disconnect fear based habits with this mediatation…Here is a short 15 minute Pilates and Kundalini Yoga set to move your body, and a meditation for breaking bad habits. As always listen to your body and go within your limits. I hope you enjoy. Thank you